The Curse of the Lemonade
by pikaree1
Summary: Beware the lemonade, Hojo, or a certain hanyou will be forced to perform the Heimlich maneuver to get it out of you. Don't worry, that silver-haired dude over there is totally harmless!
1. Chapter 1

**Petal: My first Inuyasha fanfiction!**

**Inuyasha: Joy. Now I know how Bierrez feels.**

**Petal: ...I'm going to ignore that. If you squint, you might see a bit of what I like to call Rebornshipping! InuyashaxKagome is so awesome that it's canon. Wikipedia said they get married at the end of the series. *eyes sparkle***

**Inuyasha: The nutjob doesn't own me or my friends, thank goodness. Unfortunately, she also doesn't own Naraku, so she can't torture him.**

**Petal: *snaps fingers***

**Naraku: *appears***

**Petal: *snaps fingers again***

**Naraku: *wearing a frilly pink sparkly hoop-skirt foofy ballgown* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!**

**Petal: You were saying?**

**Inuyasha: I stand corrected.**

**The Curse of The Lemonade**

_**An Inuyasha fanfic**_

_Please note that the authoress has only watched up to episode 47 when writing this_

Kagome had decided to bring Inuyasha, Shippo, Miroku, and Sango to her era. It was an unwise decision, and no one knows why she made it. After making sure they all knew how to behave, she gave them regular clothes, hid Inuyasha's ears with a baseball cap, wrapped Shippo in a blanket, and placed the little kitsune in Sango's arms.

The group walked through town without anyone acting weird. _So far, so good,_ thought Kagome. All of a sudden, she realized it was only she and Inuyasha walking. "Where is everybody?" she asked.

Inuyasha shrugged. "I don't know."

"Don't make me say it!" the girl warned.

Inuyasha turned pale. "Miroku went somewhere, Sango went after him so he wouldn't cause any trouble, and Shippo was being carried by his 'mother'."

Kagome sighed. "Oh well. They'll come back to the house eventually..." she muttered. Then she turned to Inuyasha. "Do you want to get something to eat? It's almost lunchtime."

The dog hanyou brightened considerably. "Food!"

The pair headed to WacDnalds. (A/N: Curse you, anime translation! I hope there weren't any MacDonalds employees watching that episode...) A random pink flying unicorn passed overhead.

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><p>"Kagome?" (AN: I watched the english dub, so I don't know how they do it in Japan)

She looked up. "Hojo!" she exclaimed. "Hi!"

"Hello!" he replied. "Um... who's this?" He motioned towards Inuyasha.

"This is my friend Inuyasha. He wouldn't hurt a soul and is completely harmless!" she responded. Glaring at the half-demon, she forcefully added, "_Right?_"

He gulped and nodded. After the introductions were complete, they all got lunch: a mountain of burgers and three large lemonades.

All of a sudden, Kagome and Inuyasha turned rigid. "Sacred jewel shard," Kagome murmured.

"Demon," Inuyasha growled.

Hojo reached for one of the lemonades.

"NO! DON'T DRINK-" Kagome and Inuyasha shouted in alarm.

Hojo took a big gulp.

"-it," the pair finished.

Hojo's eyes turned swirly and sparkles came out of his ears. "Hi," Hojo giggled, "I'm Neido! I host the game Bakegyamon! I scare the players and throw hissy fits when I'm defeated!"

Kagome face vaulted while Inuyasha turned deathly pale.

"IT'S THE RANDOMNESS!" he shouted in terror. "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! AND YOUR SANITY! ESPECIALLY YOUR SANITY!"

Kagome also paled. "Grandpa told me about that demon!" she panicked. "One existing every 500 years and it can transform into any shape or color! It must have a jewel shard!"

Inuyasha performed the Heimlich maneuver and Hojo spit up the demon and promptly fainted. Kagome squished the demon with the manager's mustachio and threw it out the window. The lazy manager simply pulled off his wig and used it to replace his fake mustachio instead of chasing it or buying a new one.

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><p>Miroku, Sango, and Shippo returned to the Higurashi household to find Inuyasha and Kagome discussing what they would do if they found a randomness in the Feudal Era, and the two decided they would capture it and infect Sesshomaru with it. The end.<p>

**Petal: What started out as a half-baked idea that originated from a family joke became a totally ridiculous fanfiction of randomness.**

**Naraku: Yeah, yeah, yeah, can you turn me back now?**

**Petal: No.**

**Kanna: ...Review...**


	2. Chapter 2

**Petal: Because of a special request from shadow djinni, I have decided to write about Sesshomaru and the Randomness! I own nothing!**

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><p>Sesshomaru had been walking along, minding his own business, when a rainbow colored Shippo crossed his path. He took it down with one sweep of his poison claws, but then he started to get an odd sensation. Rin and Jaken returned to find their lord giggling like a schoolgirl and singing about not counting on something before his very first kiss and not choosing a path but there's so much he could lose. Jaken sweatdropped. <em>Yeah, like your dignity, milord.<em>

The two rushed over to the village for help. Kagome and Inuyasha were too busy laughing, and Sango, Miroku, and Shippo were too busy reminding them to breathe. Luckily, an unpossessed-Kohaku was passing by, and he offered his services. Rin was a bit unsure when she saw him in his gear, a poofy pink fairy costume. Nevertheless, he was all they had to count on.

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><p>Kohaku approached Sesshomaru and tapped his head three times with a sparkly pink heart-shaped wand and screamed, "Faerie Fiora fortunately fired fops for fighting Fridays!"<p>

The Randomness popped out of Sesshomaru and made a mad dash for Kohaku, but he was protected by the fairy costume. He took out a mustachio made from Naraku's hair and squished the Randomness with it. Because he killed a Randomness, he gained the lifespan of a demon.

After learning what happened, Kagome wondered how the Randomness/Sesshomaru knew about the Tokyo Mew Mew english dub theme song.

Random is as Random does!

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><p><strong>Petal: Was that random?<strong>

**Jaken: Please don't do that again.**

**Petal: Don't worry, I won't. I still don't understand what I wrote...**

**Randomness: Please leave a random review!**


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